An Interview With Everyone's Favorite 24 year-Old Curmudgeon

Well, okay, maybe he isn't everyone's favorite. Hell, he might not be anyone's favorite. But he is a 24 year-old curmudgeon, which is worth something I guess. Anyway, Zwill has decided that he's too lazy to be writing blog posts - a view I both understand and respect - but he will answer questions should I provide them. Fair enough. Less work for me. So now, without further ado, the first ever edition of Zwill Speaks (sort of):

Q: Should Willie Randolph be fired? If so, who should replace him?

A: I've defended Willie up to this point, mainly because I don't see him as the problem. Old hitters, an atrocious farm system and a paper-thin roster that is far too reliant on Wright, Beltran and Reyes - those are the reasons why the Mets are a mediocre squad. Omar Minaya is the party most responsible for the ongoing shitshow in Queens, not Willie. In the three years prior to the Randolph era, the Mets won 75, 66 and 71 games, respectively. In Willie's three full seasons, the Mets have won 83, 97 and 88 games, respectively. He deserves some credit for that improvement. That said, it is becoming quite clear that Randolph is a major part of the problem with the team. He may not be the main problem but he is clearly not equipped to get the most out of the squad's underachievers. With last month's half-hearted vote of confidence from the ownerships, it's looking less and less likely that he will make it to the end of the season, nevermind 2009.

If the Mets had anyone - and I mean ANYONE - in their organization with managerial prospects, the move would have been made in May. They don't. My guess is that Minaya starts by shaking up the coaching staff in the next few weeks - perhaps Jerry Manuel, Willie's right-hand man - and then fires Randolph after the squad makes a too-little, too-late push for the division and finishes five or six games back.

Q: Why is Luis Castillo hitting 2nd?

A: Luis Castillo is the #2 hitter because he has one of the best OBPs on the squad. This is actually one of Randolph's more defensible moves. Strategically, he is passable: His bullpen management leaves something to desire and his odd fascination with certain scrubs can be irritating. On the whole, however, he doesn't harm the team games with his in-game management. He harms the team by walking around with a giant black cloud over his head, right next to the axe.

Q: 4 games to the Padres? Really?

A: Yes, four losses to the Pads. Four horrible losses to one of the worst teams in the league, a team with only two hitters who can even be considered above replacement level at the moment (Giles and Gonzalez) and several hitters with sub-300 OBPs (Greene, Bard, Hairston, Huber). They are very lucky that the universe conspired to distract anyone from watching the series: Three games at 10PM EST, the NBA Finals, the Belmont Stakes, the French Open, the opening games of the Euro Championships, several dramatic Yankee wins. Seriously, why would anyone watch the Mets this month?

Q: What's going to happen to Jeremy Shockey?

A: No clue. If there was one cloud to go along with the Giant silver lining that was Super Bowl 42 (shitty pun, eh?), it was the marginalization of Jeremy Shockey. Don't forget what Shockey has meant to Giant fans since he came into the league. He's been on the team for six years. That's a long time in football. Giant fans grew attached to him. Yeah, he's an asshole. He grunts and shouts and throws off his helmet and takes 15-yard taunting penalties and calls opposing coaches "faggot" and fires up the opposition for every single game. I get it, he's a douchebag. But he's OUR douchebag. Giant fans (most football fans, I think) love that type of guy - the guy who runs headfirst into a gang tackle and pops right back up and sprints back to the huddle. He is basically the ultimate white football player for the Aughts. He behaves in a manner nearly-always associated with angry black men who are treated like louts for their actions. But Jeremy Shockey has a tattoo of an eagle blending into an American flag on his bicep. He's one of us.

So watching the Giants come together without him (and perhaps in spite of him?) last season was kind of awkward for longtime supporters. (We did have the soothing Super Bowl victory to help ease our pain.) And listening to Giants fans turn their back on him after Kevin Boss made a few catches in the playoffs was downright traitorous in my opinion. Shockey has unsurprisingly handled this entire situation poorly. Rather than take strides to show his support for his teammates, he has gone the other way: Avoiding the stadium entirely during the Super Bowl, skipping team celebrations after the win, making negative statements in the press for the last few months, skipping team minicamps. The man clearly needs a better press agent. I don't see the team trading him at this point, nor do I expect an outright release. A holdout wouldn't surprise me but the most likely scenario is that Shockey returns to the squad and mopes around the field for another season before departing after the 2008 season.

Q: How many regular season games are the Giants going to win?

A: I don't know and I don't care. We won the Super Bowl!!!

There you have it folks, the first ever Zwill Speaks (sort of). It wont be the last, because I'm pretty lazy. If any of you loyal readers (HA!) have any questions you'd like to have answered (double HA!) by a surly yet somewhat placated (due to the Super Bowl) New York sports fan, please feel free to email them to me.

And yes, I'm aware the Phillies have been kicking some serious ass. It's awesome. Keep it up fellas.