Ed Stefanski Is Doing His Job

Kyle Korver and his terrible contract were traded tot he Jazz for Gordan Giricek AND a first round pick. Look, I like Korver, but he's a one dimensional player. Yes, he can shoot threes. No, he can't guard anyone. And yes, he was overpaid. They seem like pretty similar players, although Giricek is older. Can't say this wasn't a good trade, because it looks like it was. Have fun in Salt Lake City Kyle.

This Just In: Donovan McNabb Is Still Good

I don't care if the Saints have a terrible secondary. I don't care if that final TD was a result of mind-boggling play calling. Donny can still play. Fuck all you haters. Yes, Angelo Cataldi, I AM looking at you. Blowhard.

To everyone else, Merry Christmas. That's right, I said it. Merry fucking Christmas. Hanukkah is over, and really, does anyone even know what Kwanzaa is? Kwanzaabot has been handing out that book for over 600 years. If you do know what it is, and you celebrate it, Happy Kwanzaa.

I'll be taking a few days off from this, unless something really awesome or noteworthy happens. Enjoy the holiday(s).

A Year Later, It Still Hurts

Allen Iverson was traded a year ago today. It, um, hasn't exactly worked out for the Sixers. Watching him made me giggle on a consistent basis with the way he made impossible plays seem routine. No other athlete has ever done that.



Video courtesy of The 700 Level.

My Thoughts On A Game I'm Not Going To Watch

Hooray, the Pro Bowl! Excuse while I don't give a shit. Still, the selection is interesting. It's always nice to see Eagles going to the game. Westbrook obviously deserves to be there. I suppose Andrews does too, but I don't know much about offensive lines. All in all I don't have much of a problem with the rosters, but I do have a couple legit gripes.

First of all, where is Trent Cole? He is 3rd in the NFL in sacks with 12.5, 2nd in the NFC, and he has been by far the best and most consistent player on the Eagles' defense. I understand that they're 6-8, and that the players taken ahead of him are all on playoff teams, but Osi Umenyiora? Don't get me wrong, he's good, but had William (Tra) Thomas played in week 4, he doesn't come anywhere near this roster. Half (HALF!) of his 12 sacks came in one game against a clearly overmatched Winston Justice. Cole has 65 tackles to Umenyiora's 43, and they have both forced 4 fumbles. Also, Cole doesn't have the luxury of playing opposite Michael Strahan. Why no one else outside of Philadelphia is mentioning this, I don't know.

Second, Al Harris is starting in the Pro Bowl? Really? HE'S A FUCKING BUM. I don't care if he's big and fast, he can't cover anyone! It's like people in the NFL don't actually watch him play. Have fun with Randy Moss, Al. Just don't forget to celebrate the one interception off a deflected pass after Randy has already torched you for 3 TDs and 120 yards in the 1st half.

And last and maybe even least, no disrespect to Adrian "Purple Jesus" Peterson, but Westbrook should be the starter for the NFC. Peterson is a hell of a player. He absolutely deserves to be on the team, and I'm sure this won't be his last Pro Bowl. But if you needed to win a game tomorrow, and you had to take one NFC running back, it wouldn't be Peterson. (It might be Steven Jackson, but he's missed too many games to qualify for this argument.) I'm not saying Peterson won't be a better player than Westbrook, but right now, he isn't nearly as complete. No, Westbrook isn't going to run for 296 yards anytime soon, especially not with the way the Eagles play the game. But he would also never gain only 3 yards on 14 carries. That just wouldn't happen. Westbrook is also the best pass-catching RB in the game. He has 83 receptions to Peterson's 17, with 450 more yards to show for it. Peterson has 13 overall scores, Westbrook has 11. Peterson has lost 3 fumbles, Westbrook has lost 1, and it was his first in over 500 touches. Peterson has a very bright future ahead of him, but I don't think he's had a better year than Brian Westbrook. Call me a homer, but I think the stats back me up.

Well Done Fellas

You beat the Cowboys. That's always nice. Now do us all a favor and lose the next two games. We need the highest possible draft pick. Don't do anything crazy like go and make the playoffs. No one needs that.

Anyway, there have got to be a lot of pissed off fantasy football players today, and not just because Westbrook took a knee at the 1 yard line instead of scoring a TD. At least he put up 140 total yards before that. Needed 5 points from Tom Brady or Tony Romo? Sorry. Needed 8 From Randy Moss? Tough shit. Needed 4 from T.O. Oops. Got stuck playing against Aaron Stecker? Damn. But hey, this happens every year. Once you get to the playoffs, it's a new game. Kinda like real football, though the similarities end there.

Anyway, I'm not crazy enough to think the Eagles' season isn't over, even if, mathematically, it isn't. But beating Dallas in Dallas in a meaningful game always makes me smile.

Lenny Dykstra Did 'Roids?

Really? And have you heard John Kruk liked hot dogs? And that Allen Iverson has tattoos? And Donovan McNabb is black! Really!

I mean, duhhhh... We didn't love Nails because he hit 16 homeruns in '93. We love Nails because he was balls to the fucking wall, day in, day out. It's the exact opposite of the Clemens situation. Even if he were clean, no on would love him. Because he's a fucking asshole.

Some names were surprises though, but on the whole, Bud Selig needs to be punished for this. God I hate him. More thoughts on the report later. (Maybe.)

Rowand, Iguchi, Goin, Goin, Out, Out, to Cali, Cali

Iguchi got a one year deal from the Padres to play second base (the Phils offered him an undisclosed amount for 2 years to play 3rd). Rowand got a 5 year deal worth $60 million to play for the Giants. While I'm sad to see him go, I think giving him that much money for that long is a mistake, especially when Ryan Howard needs a fat raise, and Cole Hamels will need one soon too. I'm a little worried about Jason Werth playing right field for a full season, more because of his health than his ability. Also, the 6-7-8 hitters on this team will scare no one. Good thing 1-5 is crap-your-pants worthy.

If the Mets don't land Santana (or Haren or Bedard) this team can still win the division as is. If the Mets DO land one of those guys, well, we have a problem.

You're Leaving Already?

Really Bobby Petrino? Only 13 games? Yeah, I know you only won 3 of them, but still. You weren't the goat here. The blame was going to fall on that Vick guy. You could have at least stuck around for another year and tried to pull things together. No one was blaming you. You hadn't done well, but few, if any, would have if thrust into such a situation.

Arkansas? Really? It's not like they're a big time power. Darren McFadden wont be there next season. There are about 6-7 teams better than them in the SEC, give or take. I don't even think you'll feel less scrutiny there. No one in Atlanta actually gives a shit about their sports teams. But them good ol' boys down in Little Rock*? They care. A lot. So good luck, I guess. According to Don Banks at SI.com, no one in Atlanta is going to miss you anyway.

*University of Arkansas may not actually be located in Little Rock, which is the only city in Arkansas of which I have heard.

T.O. or Randy? The Debate Ends Here

Yeah, I know this blog hasn't been updated in almost a week. Sorry. I been busy. Zwill might be dead. It won't happen again. Unless it does. Anyway, moving on. Before I get into the crux of this post - who is a better player, T.O. or Randy Moss - I'd just like to add a couple things about the Birds game.

Um, they stink. I'm not sure the Eagles have ever been this mediocre in my life - they've been better, and they've been worse. The play calling stinks, the execution outside of Westbrook leaves a lot to be desired, and the receivers just aren't good enough to make defenses worry about anyone other than Westbrook. The reason this offense was so fearsome in 2004 wasn't just a healthy McNabb and a superb Westbrook. It had a lot to do with a certain closeted homosexual that was really good at catching footballs.

They had their big 3 and they barely lost to a Patriots team that slightly outplayed them and more than slightly outcoached them, but that's another article I may or may not write. The point is, despite being one or two lucky breaks from the Lobardi Trophy, the Eagles' brass, T.O. and Drew Rosenhaus all came together to ruin a beautiful situation that would have kept the Eagles as Super Bowl contenders for years to come. Instead, the hated player is playing for the hated team and anyone who thinks the Eagles are better off without him is a douchebag idiot. Ditto for anyone who thinks Randy Moss was a risk when all you had to give up was a 4th round pick. Anyway, onto the comparison.

You have to choose one for a whole season. Both of these guys are motivated. Every other player on the team remains constant. Who you pickin', T.O. or Randy?

or

Tagline:
Owens: "Jeff Garica (read: Terrell Owens) ain't straight, homey."
Moss: "Straight cash, Homey."
Edge: Moss, by a lot.

Physical Stats:
Owens: 6'3", 224 lbs, really fucking strong, pretty damn fast, decent leaper, above average hands, but drops a lot of passes
Moss: 6'4, 210 lbs, strong enough, really fucking fast, great leaper, fantastic hands
Edge: Moss, slightly, because he almost never drops a pass and T.O. rarely makes you go "Holyfuckingshit!" when he makes a catch, whereas Moss does it constantly.

2007 Stats (through 13 games):
Owens: 74 catches, 1270 yards, 97.7 yards per game, 14 TDs
Moss: 82, 1264, 97.2, 19 TDs
Edge: Moss, slightly. T.O. isn't the same redzone target Moss is because he doesn't jump quite as high and Dallas has other good options in Witten and Barber. Still, both guys are having great years, but you can't ignore a 5 TD difference.

Career Stats:
Owens: 171 games played, 875 catches, 12,985 yards, 75.9 yards per game, 128 TDs
Moss: 151, 758, 11,964, 79.2, 120
Edge: Owens, slightly, and here's why: He never takes a game off. Love him or hate him, regardless of whatever venom he might spew about his QB or coach or team during the week, he comes to play. Always. Randy had 11 TDs in TWO seasons combined in Oakland - his last two seasons before coming to New England. Not counting Owens' 2005 campaign, when he was still putting up gaudy numbers until the Eagles shut him down after 7 games - he has put up 14 or more TDs in all but two of his seasons since 1998, which was his coming out party. Randy has admitted to not really giving a shit sometimes. When he gives a shit he's phenomenal, but sometimes he doesn't. That isn't cool.

Locker room persona:
Owens: If he's happy, everyone is happy.
Moss: Less influential and less vocal than Owens, but if he isn't pleased, it will be clear.
Edge: Even, although if either is unhappy, T.O. will still perform on the field. Moss might not.

Career defining moment(s) to date:
Owens: That catch he made against the Packers in the playoffs in 1998 remains one of the more impressive grabs I've ever seen. That was the exclamation point to a season that put him on the map. That being said, his career may be more defined by the whole Jeff Garcia and Donovan McNabb feuds than by his extraordinary talent.
Moss: After falling all the way to 21st in the 1998 draft, Moss set the league on fire for a team that holds the NFL record for points scored - a record that Moss' new team is about to break. He put up 1,300 yards and 17 TDs as a rookie, and only had one season with fewer than 10 TDs in Minnesota before going to Oakland. Before he left Minnesota there was no debate as to who the best receiver in the NFL was. His 19 TDs this season make his subpar performance in Oakland easy to overlook, unless of course you're a Raiders fan.
Edge: Moss, slightly. Neither of these guys will be remembered as ideal teammates, but if they both retired today, Moss' legacy would be cleaner and more impressive.

Final Verdict: Moss, but it's close. They're both essentially locks for the Hall, but Moss is the more unique, dynamic talent. Also, he isn't nearly as big of a dick/drama queen.

Oh No. No No No No No.

Rumor - substantiated rumor - has it that both Miguel Cabrera AND Dontrelle Willis are headed to the Tigers for six players I've never heard of who someday may be good. We're adding BOTH of these guys to the Tigers?!?!?!?!

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. On the surface this isn't all bad - at least the Phillies don't have to play them 19 times a year. But holy shit, who the fuck is going to beat the Tigers?! Miguel Cabrera is, by my humble estimate, the third best hitter in baseball, all things considered. (Pujols and A-rod are ahead of him. It's also possible that Matt Holiday is as well, but remember, he's a Rockie.) Yes, even I, worshiper of all things Utley, think he is better than Chase. And now he's joining a line up that is going to feature him, Magglio Ordonez, Gary Sheffield, Curtis Granderson, Carlos Guillen, Placido Polanco, Ivan Rodriguez AND Edgar Renteria?! Hold on to your asses, American League. Y'all in some trouble.

And then there's Dontrelle, who, granted, has not looked good since his monster 2005 campaign. But he's still young and Comerica is a pitcher's paradise. Barring injuries, this team is winning 110+ games. Yikes. This makes me especially sad for two reasons:

1.) I really, REALLY wanted the Phillies to land Cabrera. I don't care what it would have taken, as long as it wasn't Chase, Jimmy or Cole. I would have given up Howard. Yes, Cabrera is THAT good. And he's 24.

2.) What has happened with the Marlins - winners of not one but TWO World Series championships over the course of their 15 year existence - is absolutely sickening. Your team has no revenue? Thats because you alienate all your fucking fans by selling off your talent! The firesales that occurred after 1997 and 2003 were atrocities. That team needs to be either moved or taken from the current ownership. In a city with a HUGE Latino population, you can't sell baseball tickets? That, my friends, is sad.

So yeah, this is terrible news for anyone not in Detroit. For anyone in Detroit, go fuck yourselves. Lucky jerks.

Maybe The Sixers Are Headed In The Right Direction After All

They finally canned Billy King, one of the absolute worst GMs in basketball (which is REALLY saying something). This move came abut 6 years too late, but hey, better late than never. King started fucking up as soon as he was handed the keys to the franchise - he drafted Larry Hughes over Paul pierce, among others, in 1998 - and kept fucking up until they got rid of him, which they did today.

His replacement, Ed Stefanski, has at the very least a decent resume, as he is one of the architects behind the current New Jersey Nets team, which is good if not great. He is also a Philly area native and will no doubt be committed to making the Sixers not suck. Good luck buddy. You got a ways to go.

You've GOT To Be Kidding Me

I... I got nothin'. Despite Brady ending up on his ass multiple times, the Ravens, much like the Eagles, couldn't take care of business. Patriots, 2, mid-Atlantic birds of prey, 0. I'd be lying if I said I was sick, but I'd be lying if I said I was thrilled, too. For the third week out of 4, the Pats had no business winning and somehow still did. Oh well. As I said before, I don't know if someone will best this team, but shit, someone can. Fingers crossed baby, fingers crossed.

How Dare You Boo A.J. Feeley!

Yes you, fellow Eagles fans. You wanted A.J., you got him. Why any of you are the least bit surprised that a back up quarterback played like - gasp! - a back up quarterback, I have no idea. But in a poll conducted by the local NBC affiliate, over 70% of those polled this past week said they wanted Feeley to start regardless of McNabb's health. So, roughly 70% of Eagles fans are morons, give or take? Yeah, that sounds about right.

Well, I'm not a fucking moron. Feeley now has 7 interceptions on the season. Donovan McNabb has 6. A.J. has started 2 games. Donovan has started 10. Hmmm, one of those things is worse than the other. Now look, I understand McNabb is still banged up. It is, after all, December. Given the circumstances, Feeley should have started against the Seahawks. But the circumstances are not "A.J. Feeley is better than Donovan McNabb". The circumstances are "Donovan McNabb is hurt". And Jesus, he needs to heal. Fast.

Honestly? I'm glad Feeley played like dog shit. Don't get me wrong, I wanted the Eagles to win, but I was tired of hearing blowhards like Angelo Cataldi croon on about how McNabb needs to go. SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. He's the second best Philadelphia athlete of my generation - behind Allen Iverson - and while Chase Utley is one more great season away from surpassing him, he will forever go down as one of the greatest Eagles of all time, and that's saying something.

Before the season started I wrote this, a piece about great Philly athletes of the last 15 years leaving town despite having something left in the tank, something to contribute to the team, and about how I do not want to see McNabb going down that road. A week ago it seemed inevitable that he would be gone well before he retired, before he stopped playing well. A week, later, that seems less certain. After the game reporters were getting fan reactions from Feeley's God-awful performance. One reporter had this exchange with a fan that had brought a pro-Feeley sign to the game:

Reporter: So who do you want to be the starter next week?
Fan: McNabb!
Reporter: But last week you said you wanted Feeley.
Fan: Well not no more!

Without even playing, Donovan has gained back much of the fan support that was rightfully his. And for that, I will not boo A.J. Feeley. I thank him. The Eagles needed him, and he came through in spades. Now let us never speak of him again.

Al Harris Is A Bum

While watching the cowboys-Packers game Thusrday night, Bryant Gumbel - the man that Wayne Brady makes look like Malcom X - said that "there is no finer cornerback in football" than Al Harris. Um, do you watch football Mr. Gumbel? Al Harris stinks. Yeah, he's 6'2" and he's fast, but that doesn't mean he knows how to cover anyone. T.O. was ass-raping Harris all night long to the tune of 140+ yards and a TD - in the first half. And it would have been even worse if Owens hadn't decided to lateral what would have been another touchdown to Harris in the endzone.

Harris was the Eagles' nickelback for a couple years, and my friends and I used to joke about how he was pass interference penalty just waiting to happen. We would actually make bets as to when he would be flagged prior to every game. It was actually kind of fun. Once, as a senior in high school, I was sitting in homeroom discussing Harris and his lack of talent with a friend when a girl in my class, surnamed Harris, overheard us and this exchange took place:

Her: Hey, he's my uncle!
Me: Really? Oh. Well he's still a terrible cornerback.
Her: So, he's still my uncle!

(20 seconds of blank staring).

But you see, even she had no defense for the fact that he was a bum. Not much has changed since then. Al Harris sucks.